=(

I don't have the energy to write
My eyelids droop
Cheeks still stained with tears
Why haven't I conquered this
After all these years
I wish I could remember when
When I didn't sink this low
But though the price I pay
Is high
The psychosis still seems to grow
And instead of settling
Gently into my lovers arms
I cry and shout and burn with pain
For all I want is peace and acceptance
It is here at hand,
But at the last minute
I self-consicously turn away.

----
And while I sat here moping I just horribly let my French partner down and she did all of a project (short project a skit that we had all but finished other than three lines in class, but still I feel horrible... er...

friendship

There is something funny
About the setting sun
The way it glows
And goes
There is something funny
In your smile
Crooked, your grey eyes
Have something to hide
Dance my friend dance
into the setting sun
Don't let them break you down
The world may fall
But we'll still be
And between us
We'll have a song and dance.
As much as our minds
Break us down
It'll still be our song and dance
That makes the sun rise again.

fantasy

The music wraps around me
Intoxicating and bittersweet
The warmth in your eyes
Draws me close
And so it goes
The soprano drones on
The pianist smacks the keys
The awed breathing
Of the spectators
Unbelievable! For them
To be so easily wowed
Reclining my head
Upon your chest
I close my eyes
And let the dream begin
A concert hall, an opera house
Germany, Austria, France, New York, Italy
And I'm the one they want to see.
To feel that joy, to let the music pour
Like a torrent from my body
Let the emotion unravel
Oh the utter ecstasy...
And to walk home
To a little rundown hovel
No money for bread or water
But content... save one thing
If only I could keep you in my arms.

aftermath

The dreams are worse
They won't stop - unceasing
Why can't I simply let go?
Why tell me things
I can no longer undo?
Why torture me,
With hopeless ifs and whens?

Today

Some days are slower than others. Today was one of those days. Some of the minutes felt slow I could feel them drag past my body like a flood of molasses dragging me though life. Today was not a bad day, merely a slow day.

meeper shneeper

meeper shneeper shneep shneep
meeep meep meep shneep

<3

Snow

The swirling little fluries
Decorate the Air
Floating slowly, floating quickly
Falling everywhere
The people panic
Some just stand still
All fall to mother nature's wrath.
But her temper tantrum
Invokes such wonder
And beauty it thus creates
So can we not help, but wonder
What are we doing here?